my children:
my children may not be the most well behaved, they may not have the best sense of restraining themselves... i discipline my kids, but i do not hinder my kids in being who they truly are.
They are outspoken,
opinionated,
hyper,
comical,
serious,
dramatic,
inquisitive,
and on occasion,
they have been known to be uncontrollable.
.... BUT.. i let my children be who they are, and give them all the space in the world to develop their OWN personalities.
They are also wonderful,
caring,
sensitive,
loving,
compassionate,
sweet,
giving,
understanding,
fun loving,
outgoing,
and SUPER FANTASTIC.
I accept them for who they are unconditionally.. good bad and indifferent. My children are allowed to speak their opinion, and they are allowed to ask questions. They are not allowed to be outright rude or discourteous to ANYONE at any time. I teach my children manners and etiquette....
I teach them to understand both sides of a situation, but all four of them KNOW how to defend themselves if the situation calls for it.
I love my kids.... and they know it.. they trust me and know they can come to me with anything and we will discuss it... Motherhood is not something that we know when we have children, but something that we continue to learn every single day. We are never finished growing as parents. Don't blink or they will be grown...as mine are almost grown and i wonder where all that time went. Don't close your mind or your heart to who your children try to be, that will only make them resent you, it will only make them be who they are without telling you... and i think that is one of a mother's worst fears... is raising her kids and then realizing she doesn't know who they truly are. This post is dedicated to all my mommy friends... and to my children...... who are my everything and make every day worth waking up to... :)
Wednesday, January 25, 2012
My letter to my Biological father
This is a letter i wrote to my biological father, who lives only 45 minutes away from me and has only met me once. figured i would post this and try to get some circulation. oh... it has been 2 years since this letter was written.
*written to Thomas E. Geiger of Columbus, Ms**
Thom,
I am writing you this letter in hope that maybe you will respond via US Postal Service. I don't know what is going on, but I think it is very unfair of you to refuse me a chance to know if you are my father or not. I have been waiting for 13 years at the end of this month to know the truth. I want a blood test. You said before that you wanted it too, but you have made me wait over a month for a response, and I am wondering if I am ever going to get one.
I want you to know something, I am SICK and TIRED of being treated like a stray dog that just showed up outside someone's door step. My entire family treats me like that, and now you too. Let me tell you something Mr. Geiger, it is not MY fault that I was conceived or that I was born. It was not MY fault that my mother did what she did or made the choices that she did. It was not MY fault you and my mother could not make your relationship work. I did not ASK to be born, did I? So how is it that I am the only hone suffering from this whole mess?
You keep saying how you and your wife have suffered, and how people have treated you. How about the way you have treated me? You slept with my mother, got her pregnant, married her, and then just tossed me out like yesterday's garbage. To this day you treat me like I am some nuisance filled stray dog that keeps scratching at your door for some reason. I want answers and it is YOUR responsibility to give them to me.
If you would have tried to find me... you would have found me. I have been in Mississippi for over 10 years now, when have I heard anything from you? I have tried to contact you several times, and all I have heard back is "if you contact us again, we will press charges for harassment" You are the epitome of hypocrisy Thom. You preach about truth, and facts to all of the people on your forums, but you have no idea what that word means do you?
If you were so interested in "facts" or so interested in the truth, you would be getting the blood test wouldn't you? But no, you are afraid that I am going to cause problems with your wife. YOU won't even tell me if I have brothers and sisters somewhere I don't know about. I know I do. Why won't you at least grant me that? I want to know Thom. I guess my first impression of you was wrong... you are not a smart and reasonable person, because if you were, you would be trying to resolve this issue, or at least paying some attention to it.
I am so tired of being treated this way by someone I don't even know, but I will not stop until I have the answers that I am looking for. What are you afraid of? That you neglected a part of you for 25 years? That you acted like she didn't exist and you knew where she was the entire time? I already told you what I want... when you so blatantly told me supposedly that I can not get money from you because you put in the divorce papers I couldn't have any money unless there was a blood test performed.
My opinions on that are that I don't care who a man thinks he is or isn't.... if there is a possibility that he fathers a child, he should step up and take care of that responsibility. It takes two people to have a child, not just one. My mother definitely did not impregnate herself. You came looking for me when you were running for office for some reason last year.
You told the people you talked to that you knew I was your daughter, and I looked just like your sister. There really isn't any question in your mind about it but let me quote you from your last email "my conscience is clear" can not be true because if it is you are a heartless man. I have been an outcast my entire life because my "father" left me. I was never dales real daughter and no one saw it that way, my mother's family didn't accept me because they never accepted you.
Point being Thom, I want my chance. I DESERVE to know if you are my father or not!! I have tried and tried to get in contact with you and get this solved, but you keep dodging me. Especially after I told you that I was rh- antibody. You know that affects less than 15 percent of the population worldwide. So there is very little possibilities of someone that either of you knew being rh- as well that could have been my father. It would have been a freak occurrence. I am going to keep sending this letter, I am going to keep trying to get in contact with you until you get what you wanted... a blood test... I know now that you will never let me in your life, or in your heart, or share any kind of emotional attachment to me.
You make known publically your views on other races.... But all the things that you claim to be upheld in other communities...and trademarks of what you think they are like "dead beat dads" you need to go look in the mirror at yourself. I am tired of you and your holier than thou attitude, I am tired of you thinking that you decide when things happen like you are some kind of ruler over my life.
You slept with my mother, you married her... you are on my birth certificate... you have an obligation to me whether you like it or not. I am not some poor uneducated person you can persuade to believe anything that you want. You do have an obligation to me.... You owe me not only an explanation but the truth. My mother didn't make you stay away... my mother did not put a gun to your head and stay away from your daughter.... And even then most GOOD parents would have still pursued the issue...I guess that's just not something you will ever be is it?
I have four children and you have met and spent time with two of them.... When are you going to meet the other two? You can go and listen to my life from everyone I know, and not hear the truth from me? How is that right? Right now, I think that you came looking for me last year while you were running for office just because you wanted to keep drama down and you didn't want me to ruin things for you. Looks like I didn't have to do that, because from what people say, you do that on your own. You are no better than me, in fact I am a product of you. So in that sense, I am the best parts of you, at least that is how I see having children.
I will await your response....... You know how to get in contact with me!!
Kristina
I am writing you this letter in hope that maybe you will respond via US Postal Service. I don't know what is going on, but I think it is very unfair of you to refuse me a chance to know if you are my father or not. I have been waiting for 13 years at the end of this month to know the truth. I want a blood test. You said before that you wanted it too, but you have made me wait over a month for a response, and I am wondering if I am ever going to get one.
I want you to know something, I am SICK and TIRED of being treated like a stray dog that just showed up outside someone's door step. My entire family treats me like that, and now you too. Let me tell you something Mr. Geiger, it is not MY fault that I was conceived or that I was born. It was not MY fault that my mother did what she did or made the choices that she did. It was not MY fault you and my mother could not make your relationship work. I did not ASK to be born, did I? So how is it that I am the only hone suffering from this whole mess?
You keep saying how you and your wife have suffered, and how people have treated you. How about the way you have treated me? You slept with my mother, got her pregnant, married her, and then just tossed me out like yesterday's garbage. To this day you treat me like I am some nuisance filled stray dog that keeps scratching at your door for some reason. I want answers and it is YOUR responsibility to give them to me.
If you would have tried to find me... you would have found me. I have been in Mississippi for over 10 years now, when have I heard anything from you? I have tried to contact you several times, and all I have heard back is "if you contact us again, we will press charges for harassment" You are the epitome of hypocrisy Thom. You preach about truth, and facts to all of the people on your forums, but you have no idea what that word means do you?
If you were so interested in "facts" or so interested in the truth, you would be getting the blood test wouldn't you? But no, you are afraid that I am going to cause problems with your wife. YOU won't even tell me if I have brothers and sisters somewhere I don't know about. I know I do. Why won't you at least grant me that? I want to know Thom. I guess my first impression of you was wrong... you are not a smart and reasonable person, because if you were, you would be trying to resolve this issue, or at least paying some attention to it.
I am so tired of being treated this way by someone I don't even know, but I will not stop until I have the answers that I am looking for. What are you afraid of? That you neglected a part of you for 25 years? That you acted like she didn't exist and you knew where she was the entire time? I already told you what I want... when you so blatantly told me supposedly that I can not get money from you because you put in the divorce papers I couldn't have any money unless there was a blood test performed.
My opinions on that are that I don't care who a man thinks he is or isn't.... if there is a possibility that he fathers a child, he should step up and take care of that responsibility. It takes two people to have a child, not just one. My mother definitely did not impregnate herself. You came looking for me when you were running for office for some reason last year.
You told the people you talked to that you knew I was your daughter, and I looked just like your sister. There really isn't any question in your mind about it but let me quote you from your last email "my conscience is clear" can not be true because if it is you are a heartless man. I have been an outcast my entire life because my "father" left me. I was never dales real daughter and no one saw it that way, my mother's family didn't accept me because they never accepted you.
Point being Thom, I want my chance. I DESERVE to know if you are my father or not!! I have tried and tried to get in contact with you and get this solved, but you keep dodging me. Especially after I told you that I was rh- antibody. You know that affects less than 15 percent of the population worldwide. So there is very little possibilities of someone that either of you knew being rh- as well that could have been my father. It would have been a freak occurrence. I am going to keep sending this letter, I am going to keep trying to get in contact with you until you get what you wanted... a blood test... I know now that you will never let me in your life, or in your heart, or share any kind of emotional attachment to me.
You make known publically your views on other races.... But all the things that you claim to be upheld in other communities...and trademarks of what you think they are like "dead beat dads" you need to go look in the mirror at yourself. I am tired of you and your holier than thou attitude, I am tired of you thinking that you decide when things happen like you are some kind of ruler over my life.
You slept with my mother, you married her... you are on my birth certificate... you have an obligation to me whether you like it or not. I am not some poor uneducated person you can persuade to believe anything that you want. You do have an obligation to me.... You owe me not only an explanation but the truth. My mother didn't make you stay away... my mother did not put a gun to your head and stay away from your daughter.... And even then most GOOD parents would have still pursued the issue...I guess that's just not something you will ever be is it?
I have four children and you have met and spent time with two of them.... When are you going to meet the other two? You can go and listen to my life from everyone I know, and not hear the truth from me? How is that right? Right now, I think that you came looking for me last year while you were running for office just because you wanted to keep drama down and you didn't want me to ruin things for you. Looks like I didn't have to do that, because from what people say, you do that on your own. You are no better than me, in fact I am a product of you. So in that sense, I am the best parts of you, at least that is how I see having children.
I will await your response....... You know how to get in contact with me!!
Kristina
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